Remember that naive old you who got married and thought “I have two mothers now” – ERR *ERROR 401* YOU DON’T. Now we’re not saying all mothers in law are bad, we’re just saying they’re not that great to their daughters in law (well, most of them aren’t). We bring you 7 different types of mothers in law that you can relate to:
1.The Khushkhabri Machine
Family planning ker lo. Oho, tumhein phir periods ho gaye? Bacha kab de rahi ho hamein? Iss umar tak tou meray 4 bachay thay!
This Khushkhabri machine only sees you as a baby producing machine – from keeping up with your monthly menstrual cycle to asking you when you’re giving her a grandchild (and that too, in front of other relatives), this Mother in Law definitely knows how to push your buttons. Pro Tip: Just respond with “Jab Allah ki marzi ho”
2.The Bhooka Brigade
Now this one never misses out on a chance to remind you of all that your parents didn’t do for her or didn’t do enough (as per her unachievable standards). From the watch that her son didn’t get to the diamond earrings she was expecting, a new bahu for her meant a whole makeover for her house. And the classic hinting on jahaiz without directly asking for it takes the cake. Don’t be so surprised when she says “Hum ne kaha kuch mat dein tou tumharay walidein nay kuch bhi nai diya.HMPH!” All she wants from you is – “Apna moo band rakho aur batway ka moo khulla”
3.The Honeymoon Caller
Boy, oh boy. You can never catch a break. It’s only been two days since you left for your honeymoon, and somehow, your phone can’t stop ringing. Your mother in law has impeccable timing – just when the candles are lit and the mood is set, she somehow makes an appearance like the devil’s spawn. And what’s even better is what she most likely says on that phone call “Meray betay nay Khana khaya” because of course, why would she ask you what you had for dinner. And then, in only two days, she believes her son’s missing his own mother on his honeymoon (READ: NO HE IS NOT!).
4.I Know What You Did Last Night
Okay ladies, this one might make a few of you blush (or maybe that’s just anger showing through your face) but don’t be surprised if your mother in law asks what you two did on your wedding night. From asking about intimate details to asking how her son is in bed, this one definitely doesn’t understand the meaning of boundaries.
5.”Yeh Tou Meri Beti Hai”
This one might call you her beti ever so often, but before you get swept away in emotion, pause for a second and take a look around – she only says this when her relatives are around. This fake sentimentality only awakens in an attempt to show others what an amazing “saas” she is. But forget not all those times when her actual beti sits and relaxes while you’re in the kitchen washing dishes!
6.The One that Got Away
And then, hold on, while I get a tissue to wipe away those tears. There are also those mothers in law that left the world before you joined the family but somehow, it feels like they never left. “Don’t move that lamp – Mama left it like that” to “Don’t change these cushion covers – mama loved them” – Um, hello – the lamp no longer works and the cushion covers look a 1000 years old! It feels like this saas bahu relationship survives death too – because they are there even when they are not.
7.The Diamond in the Rough
And then, there are those remarkable women that make a vow to never put their daughters in law through anything they went through themselves – those that never call their bahus betis, but definitely treat them like one. The ones that will scold the son for mistreating his wife and the ones that will continue to support their bahus through thick and thin. We don’t say these don’t exist – they do. But they definitely are 1 in a million. If you find one, hold on tight!